英作文です 添削してほしいです！ 外見を変えることについて意見を述べよという問題で、私は2枚目の写真のように書きました。 模範解答は3枚目です。 お願いします🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

1 テーマ4 様々なもの(社会問題など)を論じる Changing one's appearance through cosmetic surgery, body piercing, and tattoos\has become more common for people young and old、 Some people opposè the idea of changing parts of one's face and body artificially, while others support 'the idea of making one's appearance better for one's own benefit. What do you think about this? Write a paragraph (defending ONE of these opinions, giving at least one appropriate reason to support your answer. [早稲田大]

添削お願いしたいです！ 拙い点あるかと思いますが、文法ミスや変な言い回し等あれば教えて頂きたいです。

No. 14 Dale 1When I bought Smart phone , the 7 上fect hoppened , Belire ertering high wehool6 1 heard cnost of my fricnds 9ot their oun 44 Swart phones in0rder to Commuwnicate with friends . (c So.I asked my y porents Jor alowing me to have - Sar fphones.

~however we are careful が✖︎で 　　　〃　 careful we are が○なのは何故でしょうか

4. We sometimes [ we /get / are / however / sick / careful ].ia ddi Harar dss We sometimes J6p aidh an opelC 私たちはどんなに注意深くしていても, ときに病気になることがあります。

頻度を表す副詞がなかなか覚えられないんですが、どうすれば良いですか？日本語の意味がほぼ同じように思えて、覚えるのが難しいです😭

赤線の分のintroducedってどのように訳せばいいのでしょうか？教えていただきたいです

The scientists used GPS technology to track the movements of hundreds of moose and bighorn sheep/Some belonged to older sroupshatjhad lived in the west for more than 200 years。 while others were part of newer groups that had recently been to the area/The result was that almost all the members of older grOupS migrated at the right time between the higher and the lower parts of the mountains However。 newer groups usually moved at the wrong time or did not move at all. In fact。 among animals that arrived within the last 10 years。only 9 percent were able to make the move Successfully. In addition, the scientists recorded how much food was available along the migration routes that each animal iook/T hey found that animals from older groups chose routes that had arge amounts of food一sometimes traveling great distances between food sources. However, animals from newer groups only moved to nearby sources of food that they could Ss to the scientists。this shows that moose and bighorn sheep have gained Knowledge of the best routes from older members of their groups, but this knowledge did not exist in the newer grOUDS.

赤線の和訳はどうなりますか？hundreds がどのような日本語になるかわかりません。教えていただきたいです🙇‍♂️

ーー 一 こしとにCSICED HUCO St8KCS./1 1S WadS DCCauSe。in tne 19tn century, a只、4 disease nad caused the death of a large number of these animals/ However。in recent earS。 scienistS have_brought a number of these animals from other places to restore their popujafons/Therefore, there were both new and old groupS to compare. Te scientists used GPS technology to track the movements of hundreds of moose ーー ブー一 And Dienorn sheep/Some belonged to older groups that had lived in the west for more nan 200 years, while others were part of newer groups that had recently been introduced ) (he areaノTne result was that almost all the members of older groups migrated at the gnf fme betyeen (he higher and the lower parts of the mountains. However。newer oups usuaJjy moved at the wrong time or did not move at all. In fact。 among animals rf arrjved within the last 10 years。 only 9 percent Were able to make the mo ceSS人月Y. m addirion。 (he scientists recorded how much food was available along the migrati( es af each animal took. They found that animals from older groups chose routes 人 Jarge amounts of food一sometimes traveling great distances between food sourc ever。animals from newer groups only moved to nearby sources Of food that 1 | see. According to (he scientists、this shows that moose and bighorn sheep【 d knowledge of the best routes from older members of their groups。but 避。 St Ci

明日､パフォーマンステストがあるんですけど､下のEmmaを紹介する文を作らないといけないんですけどどうしても文の組み立て方がわからなくて困っているんです‼️どうか助けてくれませんか❓

名前: Emma (婦) 出身地: オーストヲリア 好 き: 本食、フルート 部活: 音楽部 〇時々だし巻きを作る 毎週火曜日と木曜日にフルートを練習する 8ってUるは 50介 草本較6計てとできる の毎本画をする

どういう並び順になるのか教えて頂きたいです。。

Sometimes, I thought that I wisth I could play basketball my friend,because I felt lonely. 私は1人で寂しかったので時々友達とプレーしたいと思った。 という文にしたいのですが、、、 ... 続きを読む

5のchildren～の部分のbutからの日本語訳の意味がよく分からないので教えて欲しいです。 また最後のthatはdignityを修飾するthatですか？

csve seSevesyeseeweeewveeeewlesweeseeseeeoeseosee ゃeeee eeeseee ee 第4 ・5段落 1Our children make us angry sometimes. 2They get lazy, they make mistakes they q 1 o silly, mischievous or thoughtless things. 3But when we adults react without thinking, when we shout or strike, we usually accomplish Hittle. 4And rightly so: we exhibit te very behavior were trying to discourage. sChildren do need discipline, but how can we get them to do the right thing without josing the calm, adult dignity that they need to witness in us? 人はときに私たちを起らせる。 2怠けたり過ちを犯したり。ばかばかしいことやいたず \別をことをする。:だが私たち大人が考えもなしに反応したり下鳴ったりぶったりして 、ていはほとんど効果がない。*それも当然だ。私たちは自分たちがやめさせようとして そのものを見せているのだから。 つけが必要なのは確かだが 子供たちが我々の中に見いだす必要のある冷静な大人 誠を失うことなく。 どのようにして彼らに正しいことをさせればよいのだろうか。 jaZy |怠けた」 mischievous |いたずら好きな」 thoughtless [軽率な, 考えのない」 complish Htle の HitHe は名詞で「少ししかないもの| という意味。 react「反応する」 accomplish 「を成し遂げる」 ightly 「当然のことだが」 exhibit 「を示す」 eed の do は動詞強調の助動詞 do。that 以下は the calm, adult dignity を修館する隊人 ! discipline 「規律,。 しつけ」 get O to の「0に…きせる] m |落ち着いた」 dignity 「威厳」 witness 「を目撃する]」 本9の @ 9 9る を p る 6 る るらら?るるもする のの?るみ人るらるるるみみるるるるもらタるみるる